what does this say to you?

i know, i know, they didn't say much to me before either except for "$$$". except i have always had a huge crush on those iconic wolf red knobs.

last night was my first ever nkba meeting (national kitchen and bath association--don't laugh it's a real thing). after inquiring to a few members "so how does this deal work?" most assured me that we'd have some good wine and hors d'oeuvres (horse doovers as my grandmother pronounces it) followed by a rather boring schpeel on some relevant topic. great.

i was pleasantly surprised (more pleasantly than most) to find that we were getting a tour of products by the wolf-sub zero rep. yesssss. red knobs, here i come. but let me tell you something: it was SO interesting! i don't lie. wanna know some fun facts? ok:

-sub zero refrigeration not only is energy star rated, but runs on 2 air compressors (as opposed to the 1 of all other products), meaning your freezer and refrigerator receive air independent of each other.

- sub zero refrigeration has been known to have heads of lettuce last 5 WEEKS! what?! crazy talk! get outta town! its true. not only that, but each product comes with a chart, showing you exactly where to put each item of food in its ideal location for freshness. neato!

-wolf stoves/ranges have completely separate outputs for a simmering level of cooking, which generate only somewhere in the ballpark of 300btu. everyone else: at least 850btu. so you can leave something to simmer and it will never burn!

-wolf ovens have an infared device on the top which cooks the top of meat (steaks especially) exactly like ruth chris steakhouse, so your meat comes out of the oven sizling on top! delicious!! i want a steak now...

there was tons of other "whoaaa" information that i could go on and on about but hopefully you get the point. and the point is: i want one of each. what can i say? he's a good salesman. and i want 5-week-old perfect lettuce. i can't tell you how much produce i throw out because it goes bad.

of course for any of this i'd need a significant raise. wouldn't it be great if i lived in italy and could buy everything i needed for the day in the market each morning? then i'd only need a tiny little cheap refrigerator. now, that's the real kind of life.